Columns

For & Against: Ikea

FOR BY MARTIN DITMANN As I wrote this, I wondered which IKEA story I should start with. Is it the story of the time my family went to extraordinary lengths to take a new IKEA mattress home? (We pushed the passenger seats down, stuffed it into the car and my mum and I lay underneath […]

22 August 2017
Worse than Oedipus

A creature fated to die before it is born. This paradox sounds like one of Gollum’s riddles, yet it is part of the real lifecycle for male mites belonging to a genus known as Adactylidium.

15 August 2017
How To: Spice Up Your iPhone

As uni students, we are all guilty of using social media for procrastination and scrolling through our news feeds to avoid listening to the monotone drone of lecturers. Another way to avoid life’s responsibilities is by trying out different apps. No, I’m not going to tell you to download my.unimelb – you can’t even check […]

9 August 2017
Part Five: Fifty Shades of Blue

I clung tightly to a Country Road bag full of onions, engaged in a fierce tug-of-war contest with the now crazed former Prime Minister.

18 July 2017
For & Against: Ed Sheeran

Ed Sheeran is a serenading, ginger god who has descended from the heavens to conquer the musical world.

Plight of the Hunter

Pitch: Back here at the office, we were thinking about ‘family movies’ and how they seldom appeal to the entire family. So we decided to blend this ultimately playful genre with the most serious genre we could think of – film-noir. The idea is this: a brilliant detective, Blake Bigcock, is enlisted by Baby van […]

Parents From Hell

Ah, Tasmania. The butt of jokes from smog-loving mainlanders and regularly omitted from the world map, it’s Australia’s often forgotten state.

Bats in the MSD

There are ten bat colonies living around the University of Melbourne, and each one represents a different Bachelor degree.

13 July 2017
The Dog in the Hole

Continued from ‘The Mother Isn’t the Problem’.

11 July 2017
How To: Exploit the Uni for All It’s Worth

Does anyone else pay their SSAF at the start of the year and completely forget to take advantage of the free goodies provided by the university?

5 July 2017
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