FARRAGO

Ninety per cent of graduating Arts students “just didn’t think this far ahead, honestly”, new Australian Bureau of Statistics data shows.

After months of deliberation, money spent, and socialists held at bay, the 2017 Commerce faculty has cemented a deal with The North Face, which will see the popular ‘puffer jacket’ become a mandatory uniform for all Commerce students over the next five years.

She is preparing to go “full campaign mode”, after sharing Julia Gillard’s Misogyny Speech on Facebook for the seventh time.

The University of Melbourne has recently announced new upgrades to campus buildings, with bigger lecture theatres to be introduced so all students can sit at the ends of rows.

Three quarters of the Farrago editorial team will be replaced by a team of bots as part of an overhaul to the University of Melbourne Student Union’s (UMSU’s) funding.

First year Commerce student, Michael Murphey, has amazed Baillieu library staff by becoming the first student to sleep in the library for over 154 hours during an academic week.

A recent Victoria Police crackdown on incidences of jaywalking in the outer CBD has prompted action.

The Block is taking over.