A local man has today been left wondering where it all went wrong after he messaged a group chat hoping to grab some beers tonight, but was instead served absolute donuts.24 September 2019
The most important person in the world visited Melbourne Central Station today. At least that’s how it seemed as one inconsiderate asshole decided he had the right to stand still on the right-hand side of the escalator.
Bernie Green (26) has reported a massive spike in the deaths of his students’ obscure relatives and family friends since he moved his tutorial from a 2pm to an 8am timeslot.2 July 2019
There was tension in the air last night as media lecturer Jean Paul LeVol took a Cersei-esque walk of shame to the Dean’s office, after he was accused of plagiarism by failing to reference memes used in his PowerPoint slides. The University was notified of the lecturer’s theft after the Learning Management System (LMS) reported […]13 June 2019
Following recent budget cuts, the University of Melbourne has decided to axe Stop 1, choosing to replace the student services resource with the ‘Unimelb Love Letters’ Facebook page.7 May 2019
A major new study conducted by the Victorian Institute of Geography and Impetuous Osculation (VIGIO) has found that South Lawn prevails as the finest location on campus for couples wanting to flaunt their amatory success in plain view of an abundance of loners.
It’s the age old, end-of-semester question: is your cute tutor from PSYC20006 vying for your affections before you move onto PSYC30013 and split ways forever, or is he just trying to get you to complete the Student Experience Survey?12 March 2019
As excited as he was to embark on his Microeconomics breadth, Connor White, 18, has not found it easy to fit in.