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The Lifespan of an Email

11 November 2020

Ever accidentally emailed your entire cohort at 4.07am?

Tejas Gandhi has.

At the end of an all-nighter working on an assignment, the third-year politics major decided to wind down by checking up on his application for the Faculty of Arts peer mentorship program (as you do):

“Dear Concerned,

Hope you are doing well

This email is in regards to the application I submitted. I am a 3rd international student doing arts (politics major) and applied for the melbourne peer mentor program. 

I was just checking in to see if the application is in review and when would the outcome be?”

 After getting a few unexpected replies, he quickly sent a follow-up email apologising for his mistake before getting some well-earned rest.

But the damage was done.

I was one of many past and present Bachelor of Arts students who woke up to Tejas’ super-polite email (when was the last time someone addressed you as ‘Concerned’?).

But spare a thought for Tejas himself, who was woken up around 8am to over 200 replies to his email.

“My phone was right next to me on my bed and all these notifications were not stopping at all,” Tejas told me over Zoom during the SWOTVAC week where he achieved the level of campus demi-celebrity.

Even if you missed out on the original chain, you’ve all probably seen the memes, horoscopes and UniMelb love letters inspired by Tejas’ misadventures in mailing lists. But how did Tejas feel about the fiasco?

“I found it to be really funny.”

Now for the question that’s been on everyone’s minds this week – did Tejas get into the program?

“Oh yeah, I did,” he said. “So, I actually got a reply at the very next day, and they booked me for round two, which is an interview.”

So, after unwittingly teaching us Arts students a lesson on the “reply all” email function, Tejas is on track to be mentoring next year’s batch of Arts jaffies coming through.

And, if you missed out on what all the fuss was about, here is Tejas’ top five replies to his email:

  1. “Somebody should use this chain as a study in wilful illiteracy. Stop Replying. Nobody is capable of removing you. The entire chain has developed in error.”
  2. “Hi Doctor, I have a few concerns about my pubic region that I’d like to address… if you could get back to me soon so we can organise an appointment I’d sincerely appreciate it Cheers Sent from my iPhone”
  3. “Yes this may be an annoying email chain, but it’s also a great opportunity to make friends!I’m Sami, some of my hobbies include hiking, learning languages and World War history!”
  4. “All of us are on a list called “peer mentoring program list”, made by the uni, that this poor soul accidentally clicked instead of the address for applications. There is no need to keep replying. Everything is fine. No one can remove you from the list. Just delete this email and please everyone just stop replying or we’ll be here for the rest of the year.”

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Then a favourite which nearly broke WordPress:

5.

 


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