Bard Times

Part Seven: “These be the stops that hinder study quite”

On the cover was a quotation from a play he’ll one day write. To be or not to be. It sounded good, so good he ingrained it in his mind and noted to one day use it at a later time. But then he wondered, if he saw it first on paper and didn’t form it in his mind, then who originally wrote it? He wondered if anyone wrote it or if it was crafted by the Gods on scrolls of parchment and thrown into the world of mortal coils. He didn’t want to read his plays anymore. He wanted to be proud of his future work as work of his own.

11 September 2018
Part Six: “The crown will find an heir”

As Shakespeare scurried out from the Baillieu, a deluge of unpleasantness swarmed against him in the form of many knaves carrying flyers, all in colourful dress. He was in a melancholic mood and found their pressing behaviour worsened his state. He learnt a new expression from Chloe that day that he found quite effective. He told them to fuck the fuck off.

15 August 2018
Shakespeare Writes Comedy

Shakespeare remained and watched the show with bemusement. At one point, a strange-looking lad with a square jaw spoke of a foreign man called “Voldemort” doing a foreign thing called “wanking”, to which the audience around descended into deep cachinnations. Our bard sat, frowning and confused, not understanding the source of the humour.

26 July 2018
Part Five: “I can see his pride / Peep through each part of him”

Shakespeare stood in front of the mirror sans a shirt. He had hair on his nipples. He clutched a stumpy device and rubbed it under his arms, for odorous fumes he was told he exuded. He’d fallen in failure’s arms the semester prior, and he was bracing his mind for the semester to come. The bard pinched some waxy cream and rubbed it about his pate. His brown locks were now pointed, dipping down upon his brow.

17 July 2018
Part Four: “Once more I’ll read the ode that I have writ”

Shakespeare looked at his laptop. He shifted uncomfortably and read once more the task he had to end: to write 15 lines of poetry for his creative writing subject. He hadn’t written much; he was sort of gazing at the wall and remarking how pale and white it was. He looked back at his screen to read what he’d writ. From. An excellent word for an hour of work.

21 May 2018
Shakespeare at the Lecture Theatre

The invisible beasts drew a girl on the wall and her beauty shone into our bard’s pubescent eyes. He recognised her: she’d often walk through his village and pass his abode. Anne or Sally or someone. He’d pined over her, that pulchritudinous face. He wondered what she was doing painted up on the wall.

“Now this”, the lecturer began, “is a portrait of Anne Hathaway, who was obviously Shakespeare’s wife.”

3 May 2018
Part Three: “A poor man’s right in the law; ’twill hardly come out”

Shakespeare’s head tilted. From his understanding a myki was but a noise. How could he show one a beeping sound? How, indeed, could one even possess a beeping sound? His face advertised his guilt and the hairy man’s pupils dilated.

18 April 2018
Part Two: “I swear to study so, to know the thing I am forbid to know”

It was 1578. William Shakespeare was 14 years old when he left school. Then he disappeared. Between 1578 and 1582, there is no documented evidence linking the bard to any job or location. Nobody knows what Shakespeare did in those four years. Until now.

13 March 2018
Part One: “I sigh’d my English breath in foreign clouds”

It was 1578. William Shakespeare was 14 years old when he left school. Then he disappeared. Between 1578 and 1582, there is no documented evidence linking the bard to any job or location. Nobody knows what Shakespeare did in those four years. Until now.

23 February 2018