LATEST NEWS:

What are Victorian Candidates Promising Students?

With the UMSU election reaching its completion, it is time for UniMelb students to move onto the next democratic rite of passage. On Saturday 28 November, voting will open for the Victorian Election.

Yarra Council Opposes Naloxone Dispensers Near Injecting Room

Yarra City Council continues to change its position on the North Richmond Medically Supervised Injecting Room (MSIR), opposing the installation of a potentially lifesaving naloxone dispenser on Victor

UniMelb Biomedicine Student Cao Becomes Registered Sex Offender

Bao Phuc Cao has been placed on the Victorian Sex Offenders Register for eight years.

One Nation’s Controversial Flag Day Post Triggers Outrage Amongst Students

One Nation's South East Metro candidate for the state election, Colleen Harkin, arrived at the University of Melbourne on 3 September—Australian National Flag Day. Standing outside Building 168, she c

Returning Officer Drops Shock Election Ruling Against Community for UMSU

The 2026 UMSU elections have descended into chaos following a first ruling by the Returning Officer against the incumbent political ticket, Community for UMSU and its presidential candidate Daniel Mot

Article

Philosophy Student Not Unemployed But “Challenging Neoliberal Paradigms”

<p>Andrew Wilkies has boldly challenged the economic world order by refusing to consider the possibility of employment.</p>

Satire

Andrew Wilkies has boldly challenged the economic world order by refusing to consider the possibility of employment.

“If I got an offer, I wouldn’t take it—you think I want to be a wage slave?” he told Grub reporters.

“More money is taken in wage theft than by criminal theft, did you know that? I can’t participate in that.”

Twenty-three and living with his parents, Andrew has no intentions of participating in a workplace governed by capitalist exploitation.

“We’re expected to work, bred from birth to work, that’s all the media and all the schools ever tell us,” he said.

“Ever since I learnt about Chomsky’s notion of manufactured consent last semester, and saw that horrifying Four Corners report on the Panama Papers, I knew that I could have no part in that.”

With no plans to get a job, Andrew is hoping to sign enough GetUp! online petitions to provoke a global change in modern society.

His mother, Jessica, has reservations about his radical attack on the bourgeois elite.

“I think he’s just going through a phase. He barely leaves the house, he just attempts to build socialism on the internet with his friends and has a go at me every time I buy something that isn’t organic, ethically produced, fair trade, all that shit”, she said.

“I wish he’d just get on with it like the rest of us.”

Despite these concerns, Andrew remains steadfast in his life choice.

“Until the Earth is soaked with the blood of the pigs and the proletariat rise up and reclaim the means of production, I refuse to surrender my Youth Allowance.

 
Headline by Alex Greggery.
Article by Alex Shermon.

Farrago's magazine cover - Edition Five 2026

EDITION FIVE 2026 AVAILABLE NOW!

Read online